http://www.youtube.com/p.swf?video_id=3pVahM8VRWQ&eurl=http%3A//chinesemusicblog.com/forum/p8164-2006-05-11-00%3A42%3A32.html&iurl=http%3A//sjl-static16.sjl.youtube.com/vi/3pVahM8VRWQ/2.jpg&t=OEgsToPDskITTAUsP_TlfhL-njRFKY3y


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GsrXRsXQHmM


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=acXHOLtaUf8&mode=related&search=

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SEoIuAKnen0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GsrXRsXQHmM




awards winning:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gM3EsD56ODI









a tribute to Mr Song Yue Ting, Shawn.

Life's a struggle:

正当我睁开双眼 踏入这个世界
As I open both eyes, step into this world
妈妈给我生命 现在让我自生自灭
Mom gave me life, now let me live and die as please
这让我恐惧 在我的眼里每个人都戴着面具
This lets me feel fear, in my eyes every person all hide a mask
回想过去 难道生命就是这样延续？
Remembering the past, is life really perpetuated like this?
我抽烟抽得我的肺都黑了
I smoke cigarette until my lungs are black
就像整个社会被人心笼罩着 它也是黑的
Just like the whole society that's covered by people's motives, it's also black
我背着宿命的十字架
I carry the cross of life
也渴望Power, paper and respect
Also hope for Power, paper and respect
我想这大概就是human nature
I think this probably is human nature
佛家说 烦恼即是菩提 我暂且不提
Buddhists say, worries should be brought up by the Buddha(??not too sure the meaning), I won't bring it up for now
我倒是希望能够回到母体
Instead I wish to be able to return to mother's body
老妈对不起 我时常把你气得跺脚
Sorry Mom, I often make mad enough to stomp feet
你说你后悔当初没有把我堕掉
You say you regret you didn't abort me back then
每当我放学回家 放下那沉重的背包
Every time I return home after school, put down that heavy shoulderbag
家里空无一人 只残留着你香水的味道
Home empty without a single person, only your perfume's smell pathetically remains
那时我知道 你那天晚上又要加班
At the time I know, you were working overtime again that night
我打开冰箱 拿出微波炉吃冰的晚餐
I open the fridge, take out microwave frozen dinner
老爸在凌晨两点钟醉醺醺地回家
Dad returns home stinking drunk at 2am
我从睡梦中醒来 只听到你们在吵架
I awake from my dreams, only to hear you guys arguing
我没有办法专心面对第二天的考试
I cannot focus my attention to the test next day
老师他不喜欢我 我也不喜欢老师
Teacher he doesn't like me, I also don't like teacher
我讨厌穿制服 我讨厌学校的制度
I hate wearing uniform, I hate the rules of school
我讨厌训导主任的嘴脸 讨厌被束缚
I hate discipliner's face, hate being restricted
That's trueThat's true
很多人不屑我的态度 他们说我太
coolMany people can't take my attitude, they say I'm too cool
警察不爽我都曾将我逮捕
Police dislikes me and have arrested me before
I don't give a fuck about 人家说什么
I don't give a fuck about what other people say
他们想说什么就说什么 但是他们算什么
They can say whatever they want to say, but what are they anyway
没有谁有权利拿他的标准衡量我
No one has the power to use their standard to measure me
主宰是我自己 随便人家如何想 我还是我
The host is me myself, regardless of what other people think, I'm still me
爱钱的女人只给凯子摸
Women who love money only lets Johns touch
不懂得用保险套的人别嫌孩子多
People who don't know about condoms shouldn't say too many children
金钱力量虽大 却生不带来死不带走
Though money's power is big, yet can't bring with you at birth can't take with you at death
紧握着双拳的人们何时能松开手？
When can people who tightly hold two fists release their hands?
**Life's a struggle 日子还要过
**Life's a struggle, life still goes on
品尝喜怒哀乐之后 又是数不尽的
troublesAfter tasting joy, anger, sadness, happiness, even more countless troubles
Everyday 有多少问题要去面对
Everyday have how many questions that needs to be faced
有多少夜 痛苦烦恼着你无法入睡…
Have how many nights of painful frustrations that lets you unable to sleep...

Repeat

法庭严肃的空气逼得我快不能呼吸
Courtroom's somber air makes me almost unable to breathe
当时面临着终生监禁的我开始反省
At the time, me whose facing life behind bars starts to rethink
铁栏杆之后又是个截然不同的景象
After metal bars is another different scenario
刑犯们眼神中看不到一点和平的气象
In the eyes of convicts can't see any traces of peace
仅有一寸短的铅笔 写的是监狱风云
Only have an inch short pencil, written are prison's life
日记上描绘的不是美好的户外风景
What's described in the idary is not the wonderful outside scenery
自由在他们眼里才是憧憬Freedom in their eyes is only ???
放一把自制武器在枕头旁 以防随时有人偷袭
Put a self-made weapon beside the pillow, to prepare against other's attacks at any time
有些人怀疑老婆在外偷情
Some people suspect their wives are unfaithful on the outside
有些人把家人寄来的信件一张一张好好收集
Some people one by one treasure the letters sent from family
有些人二十四小时几乎在床上休息
Some people seems to rest on the bed 24hrs
有些人精神失常 因为受不了打击
Some people mentally lose is because can't take the trauma
三个月如火如荼的漫长等待已过去
Three month's like fire like tea's slow waiting has already gone by
出狱后的我得面对三年的缓刑期
The me who's out of jail faces three years of probation
这也好 一生中第一次感觉到幸福
This is good too, first time feeling happiness in my life
但生命中的考验何止如此我不清楚
But I'm not sure if life's challenges are only thus
我不知道 接下来还有什么会发生
I don't know what will happen from now
翻开报纸的新闻又是看到放火杀人
Open the news of newspaper once again see arsen and murder
还记得某年无意间发现的照片
Still remember one year's accidental discovery of 照片(picture???)
上面有阿姨对男人施行口交的恶心画面
On it has the disgusting image of aunt performing 口交(oral sex or less explicit???) to a man
这简直摧毁了她在我心目中的形象
This completely destroyed the image of her in my heart
我无法忘怀照片中那笑容多么淫荡
I cannot forget how skanky the smile in the picture was
我抵抗 胸口存在着不安及惶恐
I resist the insecurity and fear that resides in my chest
我不断听到痛苦的声音在内心怒吼
I continuously hear the painful sounds screaming in my heart

Chorus 2X


不论我走到天南 不论我走到地北
Regardless I walk to the south of the sky, regardless I walk to the earth's north
不论我走到哪都见识到人心的虚伪
Regardless of where I walk to can always encounter people's hypocrisyIt's kinda funny
在人的眼里只有money
It's kinda funny in people's eyes there's only money
外表好像要帮你 却只是想帮他自己Appears to want to help you, but only want to help himself
笑容可掬的脸后面 谁知道是个狼心狗肺
Behind a face full of smiles, who knew is a bastard(wolf's heart dog's guts)
连朋友都能背叛 因为只有名利合他口味
Even friends can be betrayed, because only self advantage suits his taste
她说她爱你的时候讲的是问心无愧
When she says he loves you it's with full sincerity
搞不好她爱的是你身后的荣华富
贵But it may turn out that what she loves is your fame and fortune behind you
你可曾困惑 在你身旁谁是敌是友
Have you ever doubted who beside you is a friend or foe
对你落井下石的可能就是你的挚友
The one who kicks you when you're down may be your buddy
你可曾经历 当你最需要帮助的时候
Have you experienced, when you needed help the most
平常跟你称兄道弟的人都突然失踪
People who normally call themselves your brothers have suddenly disappeared
亲爱的神 伟大的神
Dear God, noble God
你可以怪我想法太过无知 但我只是人
You can blame that my thoughts are too ignorant, but I'm only human
我不信人 因为人也不信我
I don't believe in people because people also don't believe in me
不要问我为什么 我最多只能告诉你这就是我
Don't as me why, the most I can tell you is that this is just me
生命像海浪一样有时高有时低
Life is like the tides, sometimes high sometimes low
你是否告诉自己坚强渡过各种时期
Have you told yourself to be strong and pass through each type of period
我从命运的天台放眼却看不到星空
From fate's balconey, I cannot see the starry sky
漆黑的天空压在头顶使我不得轻松
Pitch black sky presses on my head making me not able to relax
在我心中 找不到一个安静的角落
In my heart, cannot find a peaceful corner
我不能再沈睡下去 良心彷佛在笑我
I cannot sleep on, conscience seems to be laughing at me
它在说：有几天几夜老妈曾经为你以泪洗面
It's saying: A few days few nights, Mom once cried(used tears to wash her face) for you
老爸他只顾己见 希望之火只见熄灭
Dad he only cares about what can be seen, hope for fire but only see extinguish
我接起电话是老爸憔悴的声音
I pick up the phone and it's Dad's frail voice
虽没见面却不难想像他当时的神情
Although didn't see each other, but not difficult to imagine his expression at the time
刚听完他最近失业的消息
Just finished listening his recent job loss news
脑海里马上浮现祖母的话 警告我一定要争气
In my head immediately appears Grandma's words, cautioning me to must make something of myself
我已经放弃所有哭的理由
I've already give up all the reasons to cry
因为我早就习惯冷漠活在无情的现实里头
Because I've already gotten used to coldly living in the cruel reality
人生要如何起头？改变要如何起手？
How will life pick up its head? How will change pick up its hand?
当活在泥沼中 要如何才能金盆洗手？
Like living in a mud puddle, how will I able to wash my hands of it all?

Chorus 4x

Uh...
Life's a struggle yeah...
Life's a struggle


-
Do you feel me?

back to update.. the previous update the photos were like shit. i went to resize and was in a rush of time so did it until so kns.

ytd caught into an accident.
duhh~
painful. but not really very painful. the rider more jialat. hais.

been practing with my dance. competition is nxt wk. only knw the first 16th steps. many to go. awww~i'm fainting.

last friday, school organised a road run at bishan. i got 9th in position! lol.den went nicole's hse to slack and rot.











really found myself into gwen stafanie thou she's not really pretty. but she's really hot. lol.

still have to go clementi tmr for dane practice. making me tired. hais. i need a break.

jus found myself a jinx to someone else lastely. am i ?!
do you ppl believe in jinx and stuffs? ..
someone console me pleasee!!

according to the previous post, i went to town aftr a ktv session with nic and ter. promised to post up the pics so the day went off somehow.. ..

we eventually took photos everywhr as expected. in mrts and almost every pace we took.. some were really lame and kiddo, most were my pics lolol.

these were pics taken tgt in threes:








SMILEs. whahaha.



















my sexy tongue~




she thinks her hand got bullet.




not edited. the contrast -- --




this one too :)









friends always.




I LOVE THIS DARN PIC. don ask me why. i dunoo.


and the rest of the photos such as .. ..




nic vanished out of the blue.




taken at my hse.




in cab..







at ktv.




sweet ain't it, uh?




lame eh.


and here comes my INDIVIDUAL fcukin sexy photos. lol:






in cab.




familiar to some ppls? @ cwp lvl5 carprk. i knw this pic KILLS my image.




this time my hair might look better then chinadoll-like eh.





fcukin KNS pic right. lol. jus post it up for e sake of posting up.







this is taken right aftr i was done w my makeups and stuffs.




while waiting for fcuking long cab.










otw back home. i saw someone bathing.




sexy bo? =x




fierce bo?




crazy.mad.out of mind, whatever.




if ever the double eyelids happens in reality..










if you're wondering what the fook is this kinda photo, we're plainly showing off the eyelashes.




i know. all lame,
anyway. was chatting was yencheng in msn a while ago. she keep claiming she got no money and stuffs. lol. miss the times lar.
found a nice pic over here and decided to share it with all of you:







. holiday ler... ... YEY .. sian.

i went to partyworld on sat with nic and ter. its v fun and we sang till we dropped. i sang my favourite songs - yuan lai ai wing na me shang by gigi and before i fall in love by coco.



aftr tt we headed to town and shopped till we drop too. took alot of pics tgt. will update pics tmr! :))

tata ~

tdy i was late for school but i'm v happy. i actually woke up at o43o am but i ended up in sch at 8am bcs nicole woke up at o7oo and i was so loyal to her i waited for her lo. hahaa. she was late but still can take 4o mins to prepare. it was raining 'mao' and 'gou' and we walked slowly to sch. i was v happy bcs while waiting for nicole under her blk dwnstairs, i saw WeiRu walked past me like gong kia. hahaa. i wasn't really sure tt it was him until i saw e tagging on his ankle then i confirmed myslf by shouting his name. he eventually halted and turnd ard to look at me. he wasn't sure who i am under the heavy rain den i shouted to him my name and he smiled asking me how's my life. den i ask him whr he's heading early mrng and he said GO WORK. v happy cos i got to knw tt they are living peacefully and happily.
it was actually like, all fated and destined lydat ley -

see, i got 2 friendster acc. one of it which was kinda nvr-use-alrdy acc. den for no particular reason, i logged in to tt acc ytd which wasn't logged in for 1yrs plus liao. den so surprised to see a msg frm mr WEI HAN, tellng me he's back. lol. den he said tt he's fine and baocheng's fine too inside, not to worry. he got me his contact and stuffs lydat. he starting wrk nxt week alrdy. so jiayou :]

den tdy aft my sch, i went to 768 for lunch with classmates and saw him! tt's the 'so much of coincidence' which i said it's fated and destined. he's white and .. still same. hahaa. but don't look like wilber pang liao ley. why huh. lol..

v happy to knw my bro's and friends are living a simple and peaceful cum happy life. really happy for them. there's one thing i really mus voice it out: wei han's gf waited for him excactly 2o mth!! really CHEERS and my salute to chai lian. you are gr8 !
wei han, she's darn gr8.

sec5 is really stress. my cl got 11/5o. must celebrate..

for my previous post, i was really angry. but most of my brain nerves told me tt i'm more to disappointed than angry. i hope the you-knw-who knws e reason of why i was so angry and disappointed. it's not i donwan to reply your sms, it's just that, .. .. what can i reply, huh? telling you lies and say no? or tell you yes? weird right. so i decided, don't reply. cos silence mean consent. so i decided tt. it's my explanation. kays.

lastly, hope all my friends who are released alrdy will really take care of themselves and also enjoy life to e fullest! hope to gather around some day!
my misses to my beloved jimmykor, kokweikor, xiaole, weiru, lawrence and weihan.
ALL THE BEST!




l-r: weiru, xiaole (top)
weihan, baocheng (bottom)










oOo miss him so much oOo
is there a day when i can live my life, myself?

-CURSE OF INFIDELITY-